How to go on summer holiday without leaving London

Soak up the Sun at Camden Rooftop Beach

Camden Beach| Courtesy Stuart Leech

Back for another year, the city beach on the rooftop of the Roundhouse is a lot cleaner than the banks of the River Thames, has a far lower chance of you catching tetanus, and has a lot more to do. Lounge around on the sand sipping pina coladas, take in the views of Morrison’s across the road, and if the heat gets too much you can head inside for table football and more.

The Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8EH

5pm-11pm Mon-Tue, 12pm-11pm Wed-Sun, until 23 Aug; Free

Build Sand Castles at JW3 City Beach

It is always the aim of a savvy holiday maker to find that spot on the beach that is slightly less busy. For those a little bit more suburban for whom central London is a big day out, try the urban beach that has been created in the outdoor space of the JW3 complex near West Hampstead on the Finchley Road. It rivals that of the Roundhouse in scope, whilst promising to give you enough space to lay down your towel without fear of overlapping with a heavily petting and scantily clad hipster couple. With a programme of activities including a live ukulele music evening, a vegetarian festival and a sandcastle building competition, the daily food and drink comes with a Middle Eastern twist – Arak cocktails, falafel and some questionable Israeli music from 2006.

341-351 Finchley Road London NW3 6ET

9am-10.30pm Sun-Thu, 9am-5pm Fri, Closed Sat, until 31 Aug; Free

Take a Stroll Along Regent’s Canal

London is not often associated with serene nature and calm bodies of water, but if you want to feel like you have really gotten away from the hustle and bustle for the summer, head to Regent’s Canal – especially the stretch east of Broadway Market. As the canal path winds north-eastwards along the edge of Victoria Park, the calmness of the water coupled with less joggers and cyclists for you to dodge will allow you to feel like you have headed to central Europe for a warm weekend retreat.

Nearest stations: Cambridge Heath and Hackney Wick

Sunbathe Beside The Outdoor Swimming Pools

Yes, these do exist in London, and yes, some are even heated and open all year round. To lay your towel out and feel like you’re having a package holiday hotel experience before doing a few lengths, head to London Fields Lido, Park Road Pools in Crouch End, or Brockwell Lido in Dulwich (all complete with lifeguards and changing rooms). For those who want something with a little more luxury, splash out at Oasis – central London’s secret pool, surrounded by the city as if you were in Manhattan for a lavish city break. SPLASH OUT.

London Fields Lido: London Fields West Side, Hackney, E8 3EU; 6.30am-9pm daily (until 6pm Fri); £4.80

Park Road Pools: Park Road, Crouch End, N8 8JN; 7am-7pm daily; £5.60; May-Oct only.

Brockwell Lido: Brockwell Park, Dulwich Road, SE24 0PA; 7.30am-9.30pm daily; £5.95

Oasis: 32, Endell Street, Covent Garden, WC2H 9AG; 6.30am-10pm mon-fri, 9.30am-6pm sat-sun; £5.30

Well, perhaps not technically lakes, but London has a small set of bodies of freshwater that might suit those more inclined to jump into a secluded lake than lay their towel on the lip of a pool. If you want to experience London’s largest fresh water pool (with no sight of the city, of course) then the large Tooting Bec Lido should be your choice. For a very organic experience, join the faithful crowds splashing about at Hampstead Heath ponds for just a quid or two, although your feet will end up muddier than Monday morning after Glastonbury. Finally, to discover London’s newest addition before the crowds do, head to the new pond at Kings Cross – with a capacity of only 60, you’ll have to mark your territory early (and try to ignore the copious building works all around you).

Tooting Bec Lido: Tooting Bec Road, SW16 1RU; 6am-7:45pm daily until 31 Aug; 6am-5pm through Sept; £6

Hampstead Heath Ponds: Middle of Hampstead Heath; 7am-6.30pm daily; £2

Kings Cross Pond: 20 Canal Reach (entrance on Tapper walk N1C 4BE 6:30am-7pm daily until 25 July; £6.50; Booking required

Strawberry Picking in the Sunshine

Parkside Farm in Hadley Wood (right on the city periphery where all the rich footballers live) is your ticket to the fields, groves and vineyards of Italy, Greece and France – but with a British twist on the fare being grown. Head there on a sunny day and while away a few hours strolling around the huge and plentiful farm, all the while helping yourself to various types of berries, strawberries, and for those who want to have a shit time, pick a bit of Swiss chard. I always feel sorry for the kids who arrive expecting to pick berries, only for their parents to try and save some money and have them picking non-descript leaves for two hours. After you have got your hands on the berries, buy a pot of cream from their in-house dairy and you have yourself a picnic of continental proportions.

Parkside Farm, Hadley Road, Enfield EN2 8LA; 9am – 5.30pm daily, closed Mondays; Free to enter, pay for what you pick

Play Petanque at Beach East

Bringing the biggest of London’s city beaches, the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park has shipped in one thousand tonnes of sand to recreate something between the French Riviera and the Rio Copacabana. In the shadow of the Olympic Stadium, you can recreate 2012 with the Olympic sport of beach volleyball on one of their two courts, or just run around loads screaming “USAIN BOLT TAKES VICTORY”. If any of that feels too strenuous then simply try your hand at the slightly-less-Olympic sport of petanque, that obscure French sport that mostly involves standing still, with a tournament that runs all summer.

Olympic Park, Stratford Waterfront; 10am-10pm daily until 31 Aug; Free

Take a Guided Tour

There’s nothing like a guided tour to feel like you have done something cultural on your holiday, aside from getting a tan of course. Assuming you don’t want to just see and hear about parts of the city you already know about, something a little deeper is needed in London, and I myself am an analytical tour guide for the city. Take your pick from London’s alternative past and quirky present, modern architecture or street art scene, and feel like you have got your fix of summer holiday culture. If you are genuinely interested, just send me a comment. There is also my Alternative History GPS tour with the VoiceMap app – highly recommended (totally objectively).

Contact me on the comments here or at my Twitter @Joey__Le for tour information.

Smoke With The Locals on Edgware Road

Head to the Marble Arch end of Edgware Road and feel like you have stepped through a portal, straight into the heart of the Middle East. Take your pick from the gazillions of bars with shisha/nargile/hookah/waterpipe/weird bubbly thing (all depending on what country you’re in), dotted along the main road and off the side streets, and grab a water pipe full of fruity, fragrant tobacco that won’t kill you unless you do it literally every day. Indulge in some meze, drink some very sweet tea and challenge a local to a game of backgammon – all for prices far lower than its central London location would suggest – and you have yourself an exotic holiday experience and an ego-check when you get smashed up at backgammon by a 98 year old Saudi lady.

Nearest tubes: Marble Arch and Edgware Road

Catch a Flight From the Sky Garden

20 Fenchurch Street, more commonly known as the Walkie Talkie (or the Pint Glass for the alcoholics among us) has a free Sky Garden at the top. Why is this like going on summer holiday? Because the Sky Garden literally resembles a 160 metre high airport terminal. Short of announcing flights boarding, the cavernous and impressive hall has the exact feel, and even smell, of a departure lounge. Wandering around the Sky Garden will have you wondering where the nearest Boots is and anxiously checking your watch to ensure you don’t miss the boarding queue – an easy way to feel like you are heading on summer holiday whilst in the heart of the city. Then you can go back down to ground level and get on a real flight somewhere.

20 Fenchurch Street, EC3M; 10am-6pm daily; Free; Booking required